Quiet

Its so quiet at work.  The accountants are all super busy because of the end of the year.  Everyone else is gone.  I'm out of vacation days.  And have to be here to answer COP email. 

But it gives you time to think.

I find myself at a weird place in life.  Trying to prepare for the future:  for a reality that, no matter how hard I try to be prepared, I will never be prepared enough for.  Moving overseas as a missionary family.  So many things.  I am so thankful for friends in the same boat, in the same stage of life.  We've studied the Bible, we've taken every class offered on Missions, we've seen the faces of the lost with no hope.  But will we ever be prepared enough to make the move?

I find myself wondering what my reality will be in a year?  Will I be wrought with disappointment and heartache, wondering if I can really do this despite the year 2011?  Or will 2011 prove to be the best year of our lives?  What if its not?  What if that disappointment is a reality? 

These have been my thoughts the past few days.  They're hard to escape.  I'm definitely a thinker.  A planner.  A collector of information.  For some all the information would be depressing.  But I love it.  I must be as prepared as possible for whatever God has in store.