If you've been reading my blog for any amount of time, you know that this past year has been the hardest of our lives. Between support raising, infertility, and the many other demands and expectations of our time and energy, its been an uphill battle every day. I sat in church a few weeks ago, and realized what exactly it was the God has been trying to teach me this year.
To pray. To pray about everything and give it to Him. To pray as an act of worship, to pray intentionally, expecting results. To pray constantly. To take up prayer as my work where I am.
Can I just say that this lesson has been amazing. Though I still worry sometimes, I find my inner voice reminding me to stop and pray. Its a constant choice - to truly truly trust the Lord and believe my prayers will be answered. To be real with the Lord, praying from the heart, and not use the words that I think I'm supposed to. Sometimes its crying out to God with my pain, my disappointment, my worry and my doubt. Sometimes its pleading with Him. Its praying from the heart, not from the head.
Its a decision. Being in a constant state of prayer. One I'm learning to make.